From Frustration to Funny in Ten Seconds Flat! by Vicki Hannah Lein, MS Counseling

1/14/2023

Multi-volume, non-fiction author Vicki Hannah Lein introduces us to her humorous solution for dealing with frustration, “From Frustration to Funny in Ten seconds Flat!”:
"Ever since I lost my central vision almost twenty years ago, I’ve had to become an expert at finding the funny instead of succumbing to heartsickness and frustration. I’m a lot funnier now than I was twenty years ago--just ask me--and life is much more joyous and rich now. You don’t have to go blind to find the funny faster, but it helps." - Vicki

Life does not frustrate us. We frustrate ourselves by telling ourselves a story that invites us to feel victimized. We tell ourselves we are entitled to have whatever we want when we want it--a story guaranteed to make us miserable and insufferable. This book covers what to do to un-frustrate yourself and find the funny inside!

I loved this book! I smiled and chuckled on so many pages it was a real pleasure to read. Vicki has many funny stories to share about losing your temper (thus giving your power to others). Then she comes along with sage advice about how to regain control over yourself and your life. With lots more good stories!
Simple with a down-home feel, everyone should read this book and almost everyone will benefit from it.
4.9 stars from me!

You can buy this book:
https://www.amazon.com/Frustration-Funny-Ten-Seconds-Flat
https://www.goodreads.com/from-frustration-to-funny-in-ten-seconds-flat
https://www.lulu.com/shop/vicki-lein/from-frustration-to-funny-in-10-seconds-flat/paperback

You can follow the author:
https://twitter.com/vickihannahlein
https://www.linkedin.com/in/vicki-hannah-lein
https://www.facebook.com/vickihannahlein
http://www.findthefunnyfaster.com
https://radicalkindnesswarrior.com

I reviewed another book by Vicki, “Woman With a Voice”: https://www.wordrefiner.com/book-reviews/woman-with-a-voice
I reviewed Vicki’s book “From Frustration to Funny in 10 Seconds Flat”: https://www.wordrefiner.com/book-reviews/from-frustration-to-funny

Copyright @ 2023 Mark L. Schultz except for the author’s introduction

72 Comments

Vicki Lein

1/16/2023 11:23:57 am

Mark, I'm very excited about starting this process! I'm dictating this message, so there may be some errors, but none of them are my fault! I've had to do many workarounds since I lost my vision in 1994.

Vicki Lein

1/16/2023 11:31:00 am

The reason I wrote a book about how to find a funny faster is that I have to practice it every day. For example, sometimes my computer will read to me and sometimes it won't. I have to figure out very quickly how to find a way to work around the challenge, and I can't do that if I'm pounding my fist on my head.

Mark

1/16/2023 11:34:43 am

I don't know of anyone using this format for interviews.

You did well, Vicki, there are no spelling errors. I will fix those when they appear.

I enjoyed your book many, if not everyone would benefit from reading and applying your process in their life.

First question.

Please, tell us more about yourself. Perhaps something a little bit beyond your bio.

Vicki Lein link

1/16/2023 01:13:34 pm

I was always a good student. School was safe for me, and I was an auditory learner. I can memorize quickly and I was almost always the first one finished with a test. When I lost my vision in 1994, I was forced to slow way, way down. I had to wait for people to pick me up. I had to wait for people to read stuff to me. I have learned the hard way how to be patient. I fought this learning tooth and toenail as they say, but I am happy to report that now patience is hard.

Mark

1/16/2023 01:16:21 pm

Being an auditory learner was a big help in school and when you started to lose your sight.

New questions.

Are you a full-time or part-time writer?

What kind of work do you do if you are a part-time writer? Feel free to skip that question, if you would rather not answer.

Vicki Lein link

1/16/2023 02:10:00 pm

I have never made a living from my writing. I don't think I've even broken even from my writing. I write to make sense of myself and my world. I send it out to the world to keep the flow going. It's my way of showing up in my life as myself, and sharing that with the world, hoping someone might benefit from it. If only one person, besides myself, benefits from my writing, then I have done what I need to do.

Cleone L Reed link

1/16/2023 02:50:47 pm

Vicki and I have been friends since we met while each doing a workshop many years ago. I haven't read her book... yet... but we had a delightful conversation this morning on the phone about her hopefully doing a workshop in my town next month. She is just as this book says... funny! A delightful person. I have stories galore about our connections... that could be another book!!

Mark

1/16/2023 04:50:04 pm

Thanks for sharing about Vicki. I am discovering the same thing! She is fun to be around.

Vicki Lein

1/16/2023 02:57:17 pm

Every once in awhile, if you keep showing up, you will meet someone who becomes a friend for life. Cleone is such a person. She dressed my husband and me in clown several years ago, and I can still feel the sweet shyness that inhabited me when I became Bali Hi. Cleone is a treasure in many, many people's lives.

Mark

1/16/2023 04:52:25 pm

That is a delightful story! Thanks for sharing that! What a fun experience. Cleone is a lovely person; I have known her for several years and promoted a number of books that she and Bob published.

Mark

1/16/2023 04:59:37 pm

Your situation mirrors that of so many authors and writers, most of them do not break even. But the more books they write, the chance of that happening becomes better all the time. Especially if they self-publish because they keep control of their intellectual property rights. Sure, it is hard to do the first time or two, but everything is hard the first time. Remember learning to ride a bike?

Your reasons for writing are excellent! So many writers say essentially the same thing. Many people are going to be blessed by your writing.

New questions.

Is there anything unconventional about your writing technique? Why is that?

How has writing changed your life?

Vicki Hannah Lein

1/16/2023 06:00:04 pm

Everything about my writing is unconventional. I can't read my writing, so my computer reads it to me. I don't really know what I write until my computer reads it to me. Writing helps me connect to myself and others. I don't care if my writing is "good" because writing to please other people messes me up. I try to capture the event as honestly as possible.

Mark

1/16/2023 06:07:35 pm

That might be the best answer I have ever had to that question.

Your computer reads everything to you.

Are you using the Windows Narrator or some other screen reader?

Is it hard to stop the reading to have a word spelled out? There are a lot of homophones in the English language. That is my specialty as a proofreader, by the way.

Vicki Lein link

1/16/2023 06:44:52 pm

Cleone recommended you and I am so grateful! I love this cross-pollinating experience.

Vicki Lein link

1/16/2023 06:53:48 pm

I have to surrender to homophones. When my computer reads back to me, my Macintosh computer, I can't tell the difference between BRAKE & BREAK. You found a bunch of them in this book in one reading and you graciously, let me know so I could have them fixed. As an imperfectly, recovering perfectionist, I have to breathe and release when I know I am sending material out into the world with mistakes.

Mark

1/16/2023 07:10:10 pm

I am grateful to Cleone for the recommendation also.

I am a PC guy, though I do have an iPhone. I know that Microsoft makes Word for Apple computers also. I have to assume that it is the same program merely adapted to the different architecture of a Mcintosh. If you have a fairly recent version of Word it might have the narrator built in. I am using Word 2019. I can't get a newer version until I get a Windows 11 laptop.

All any of us can do is our best within the circumstances we are surrounded by. You are doing well.

New questions.

Who designed the cover of your book? Feel free to drop a link if appropriate.

Was it hard to come up with the title? What was the process?

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 07:56:02 am

My beloved friend, Deb Gauldin, designed the cover. She will make a comment soon. The book "The Four Agreements" has an agreement: always do your best, no more no less. I chant that to myself to give myself permission to be kind to myself. The book also encourages us to never take anything personally, I have to work on that all the time.

Mark

1/17/2023 08:10:58 am

I look forward to meeting your friend, Deb. Does she offer her services to all? Does she have a website? If she is on Twitter, I would like to follow her and add her to my list of cover makers.

That is good advice from the book and we can all benefit from being kinder to ourselves and others.

New questions.

You have written six books three of them are published on Amazon, will you be writing more?

Will you be publishing the other three on Amazon?

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 11:34:23 am

I will connect you to Deb. As far as I know, my book cover is the only one she has done. I am working on several books right now. I revised my radical kindness warrior book, and it will be out in about a month. I have a GoFundMe project called grandmother advocating for a kinder world. The idea in the book is very simple: when you see cruelty, you always take action, never add aggression, and keep yourself safe.

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 02:18:52 pm

I'm also working on a book called Loving in Harmony. I want to have a funny subtitle, something like even if you think you're tone deaf. If anybody has any ideas, I am very interested to hear them. The book is about my relationship with my husband, Murray. We've been together almost 28 years now, and we have the kind of relationship. I always dreamed about having, but never saw in reality. When we get into a fight, we know how to get out of one, and learn from it. We practice every day, being present, kind, and affectionate. We take care of problems as they come up, instead of letting them simmer and get septic. Murray is very funny, funnier than I am I am happy to report, and we have created. A work of art.

Mark

1/17/2023 02:33:56 pm

Thanks, Vicki, I would be happy to make her acquaintance.

Your radical kindness warrior project sounds quite interesting. I hope the gofundme is successful. Keeping yourself safe is important.

That book sounds wonderful and the relationship you and Murray share is lovely also. As a couple you are writing a story that many can learn from. My wife and I have been married for more than 46 years and have weathered many storms. We have a pretty good relationship also. I think we could learn a thing or two from you and Murray.

New questions.

Have you always thought of yourself as a writer?

How do you teach writing now?

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 03:33:53 pm

I would love to have a conversation with couples, asking the question: "How do you get into a fight and how do you get out of it and learn something?"
I absolutely did not think of myself as a writer until I was in my 30s. I remember introducing myself to a group of people I did not know, saying "I'm a writer." Since I was not struck by lightning, I decided it was OK for me to think of myself as a writer because, well, you know, I was writing a lot.

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 03:06:22 pm

I teach writing the way I counsel people – by focusing on what is working. For example, I will find a sentence or a paragraph or an image in someone's writing, and say, "wow! I can really feel what you were talking about here. Do you remember how you felt when you wrote this sentence? If you can find that sentence in your body, you can always write from this spot, and your writing will be read. Interesting, and communicate who you are to the world. When I'm counseling people, I help them find in their body, the place where they make choices that work for them. When you set that boundary, how are you feeling? Where is that in your body? All you have to do, ha ha, is remember where that place is and find it when you want to speak your truth."

Mark

1/17/2023 03:41:45 pm

You certainly are a writer. A good one at that.

I love that concept of focusing on what is working. When proofreading, I try to make some positive comments among all of the things that can be improved.

New questions.

This next question scares a lot of writers. I am talking about one of the number one fears for most people. Public speaking.

How did you get started speaking in public?

Have you ever been asked to speak about your books? If so, which ones?

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 04:45:53 pm

About 40 years ago, after having a long dialogue, with my inner critic, I decided, since I could never please that inner critic, that from that day forward, I would have fun every day. That's why I can find the fun in most situations. I love public speaking because I am not afraid of what people will think of me. I wrote a song called, "I'm Not Everyone's Cup of Tea and Neither Are You". I wish I had known this many, many years ago. Some people are gonna like what I do, and some people aren't. My job is to show up as my full self, and to play with myself in the moment. That is fun, fun, fun! Yes, I've been asked to talk about my Radical Kindness Warrior book and I did a whole workshop on playful resilience, which featured the three steps I talk about in From Frustration to Funny. I did a workshop in Bali, Indonesia, based on the book I wrote called Courage to Lead. I have done workshops for teachers based on my book discipline with the brain in mind. I have done workshops on the joy of writing, based on a book I wrote.

Mark

1/17/2023 05:00:50 pm

You are right about the inner critic. I call it the inner liar. We all have one. I advise people to ignore the SOB.

Public speaking scares a lot of people! It scared me also and I grew up with a bad stammer all through school. I learned an important lesson from a Dale Carnegie course on public speaking. Speak only about that which you are an expert. Knowing that you are an expert on the topic and that the audience is anxious to hear what you have to say makes the entire process much easier.

Well done with the public speaking. I hope you have many more opportunities to share your wisdom.

New questions.

Have you entered any writing contests?

Have you won awards of any kind for your writing?

Vicki Lein link

1/17/2023 05:49:03 pm

I have never entered any writing contest. I have won awards for my teaching and my emotional intelligence counseling program, but I'm not sure I even like the idea of writing contests. I have had people read my writing and weep. I've had people listen to my songs and laugh and cry and feel more hopeful about possibilities in their own lives. When I won the distinguished Oregon educator award, I thought I would be able to get any job an education I wanted from then on. Not so. Two years later, my job was cut. Awards are great. As long as we know what they are and what they aren't. They are subjective and I don't necessarily mean you are going to have more opportunities because you have one award. Al Pacino won an Oscar for best actor and then was unemployed for two years. We just have to do what we do the best we can, and let the rest of it go.

Mark

1/18/2023 09:47:17 am

For a lot of authors, some writing contests are about peer recognition, for other authors a writing contest is about learning to improve their writing skill. Some contests offer constructive criticism.

Congratulations on those awards! But I have no doubt that the feedback from readers was far more gratifying.

Doing the best we can and letting the rest go is very true!

New questions.

I noticed that your book is in Kindle Unlimited. How is that working out for you? Why did you choose that exclusive venue?

How many books have you put in KU?

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 12:23:48 pm

I agree. If contests are working, keep it up. I just don't want someone's opinion to get wrapped in their ego and try to sink my ship. This has happened to me before. I'm going to have you help me with my next book because I would trust your feedback.
I've published all my book except one through Lulu. They sent them to Kindle and Amazon. I get a royalty check every now and then and it makes my day. I love having all the printing and posting done without my lifting a hand. I'm all set to be a best-selling author.

Mark

1/18/2023 12:28:44 pm

I look forward to working with you on your next book.

Using a publisher, such as Lulu.com makes a lot of sense for you. If you are happy with them keep using them.

New questions.

Have you ever gone through the query process?

Were you seeking an agent or submitting directly to publishers and why did you choose that path?

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 03:16:22 pm

Yes, I tried all that years ago. I sent off manuscripts to publishers, one at a time, because I was told you had to do it that way. I would wait months and months and get a rejection letter, often a very kind and encouraging rejection letter, but when 99% of manuscripts that are sent to publishers, don't get published, I decided I didn't want to wait for somebody else to get the value of my writing. That's when I decided to self-publish. My first publisher was Xlibris, which cost a lot of money. I'm glad I did it, but I would not do it again. Instead, I've gone to Lulu and I've been very happy with their services. I'm taking a section out of the first book I wrote with Xlibris, Loving and Harmony: Even if You Don't Have Perfect Pitch, and I'm going to publish that as a book through Lulu. I'm willing to spend X amount of time doing this, but I'm not willing to spend X plus one. I just have to decide when I get diminishing returns for my effort.

Mark

1/18/2023 03:19:34 pm

Your experience with querying a manuscript mirrors that of so many other authors. The traditional publishing industry has contracted quite severely, there are only 5 big publishers left. Publishers of all sizes have gone bankrupt or been swallowed up by a competitor. Their profit margins are so slim now, they can't afford to take chances on anything less than a sure bet.

That leaves independent publishers, hybrid publishers, vanity publishers and self-publishing. Your first publisher sounds more like a vanity press than anything else. When a publisher doesn't explain all of the costs up front that leads me to believe they might be a vanity publisher.

New questions.

There are many unethical practices in publishing, which one is the most unbearable in your mind?

Is there a book that causes strong emotions to come up no matter how many times you read it?

Lea link

1/18/2023 02:34:25 pm

Thanks Mark and Vicki for this fresh and insightful conversation! Reading it I laughed and sighed in resonance. Getting from frustration to funny quickly is an important life skill I wish we all had learned as toddlers. Vicki's bright intelligence, wit and compassion and deep service to humanity shine through in every one of her books and varied creative projects.

Mark

1/18/2023 03:23:26 pm

Thank you, Lea, for dropping in. We are glad you are enjoying our conversation. You described Vicki quite well; she is like a breath of fresh air.

We hope you check back our conversation is continuing into next Monday.

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 03:11:44 pm

Thanks so much for your comment! It feels great to be seen and appreciated.

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 06:38:37 pm

I'm working on a new book and I'd love some feedback on the title. What do you think of Loving in Harmony Without Perfect Pitch?

Murray N Lein

1/18/2023 05:52:13 pm

Vicki has been committed to growth, and taking on the process of getting "unstuck" for herself and others long before we met. We keep going and try to make the process fun. I try to be funny, but can't tell a joke to save my life. We have so much fun seeing the coyote kind of humor, that is, when life is trying to teach you something by giving you a spiritual hot-foot.

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 05:57:28 pm

Murray is the funniest man I've ever known. He is just naturally funny, finding the humor wherever he goes. It's ironic that when he tries to tell a joke, it flops. It always flops. But that doesn't stop him from trying again, bless his heart!

Mark

1/18/2023 06:47:35 pm

I like the new title better than the other title. It is a little bit snappier.

You and Murray have been married for over 25 years. Mrs. Word Refiner and I have been married for over 45 years. So, I think you will agree with me that staying married takes a lot of work. Being willing to laugh at yourself and forgive the other person quickly can make a big difference. For some of us coming out of broken homes a strong commitment to the marriage helps.

Murray, telling a good joke is an art like writing a book or a song. I can't sing or dance, but I can tell a decent joke.

New questions.

Do you have a favorite book by another author or just favorite authors?

Did you have a favorite book as a child?

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 06:55:56 pm

My favorite writer right now is Fredrik Backman. tom Hanks is starring now in A Man Called Otto besed on a Backman book. The first book I remember reading that isnpired me was Black Beauty. It was not assigned. A girl was the hero, I had horses myself, and standing up to cruelty was one of the themes.

Mark

1/18/2023 07:37:46 pm

I have not read anything by Backman. Nor have I read Black Beauty. Though I have heard good things about it, starting with my sisters when we were still in school.

When I was 11 or 12, growing up in a small town, I had dreams of reading all of the books in our public library. When I saw a picture of the Library of Congress I was overwhelmed. I knew there was not enough time to read all of the books.

New questions.

Which of your books is your favorite, and why?

What about your own books, do any of them make you emotional?

Vicki Lein link

1/18/2023 07:46:51 pm

In my book, Woman, with a Voice, I wrote about when my daughter almost died when she was 20 years old. She had sudden, cardiac death and would have died if she had made it to the bathroom in her community college library. It was just luck, luck luck that the EMTs got to her within five minutes and resuscitated her. I wrote a poem, called before and after, and when someone reads it aloud, I can't read it aloud, because I can't see it to read, I always cry. Am I right about all the mothers who weren't as lucky as I was, all the mothers, following the coffin down the road. In the poem I called her my sunshine girl. Her company is called sunshine productions. How about that?

Mark

1/19/2023 08:49:35 am

What a powerful and scary event, to almost lose your daughter. We parents expect our children to outlive us. The EMTs were very close to get there so soon!

New questions.

If you could ask every person, who has read one of your books, only one question what would you ask them?

How do you handle bad reviews?

Vicki Lein link

1/19/2023 12:02:38 pm

The question I would ask someone who's read one of my books would be: did it help you? If so, what specifically helped you think of something differently or behave differently that made your life better?
Bad reviews – I've had plenty. I wrote an article for a local newspaper, and I felt it was completely misunderstood. I got letters to the editor that were hateful. I quit reading and asked my husband to read them to see if there was anything in those letters that would help me be a better writer, or a better person? If I can learn something, I'm always ready. I think I'm being very clear, but I have found out that that is not always true. I want to know what people want more of and if I put something in my book that fell flat, that didn't have any resonance, I want to know that too.

Mark

1/19/2023 12:13:29 pm

That is a great question to ask those readers. I thought you would say something like that. You are very invested in improving your life and helping others do the same.

Bad reviews and bad letters to a newspaper editor are the bane of so many writers. I usually tell authors that a bad review proves the good reviews are not coming from their mom and her friends. Many bad reviews need to be considered carefully. So often, bad reviews are the product of trolls or people who carry a grudge against the author. In either case, I recommend considering the source and ignoring those reviews. You made a wise decision asking your husband to screen those letters to the editor. I admire your dedication to improving your message.

New questions.

Does writing have a spiritual or healing component for you, does it energize you or make you feel tired?

Why is it important for writers to tap into the emotions of the characters?

Vicki Lein link

1/19/2023 04:04:34 pm

As it turns out, we are not thinking animals who feel, we are feeling animals who think sometimes. Emotions are what connect us to other people, and they override rationality, which is why people can tell big, scary lies and con other people into going along with them.

Writing does have a spiritual and healing component for me. I love to have an idea and then start. To see if I can get close to communicating that idea that is inside me. I have an essay brewing in me, called the gift of being invisible and misunderstood. I have learned a lot from being invisible and misunderstood. I've got some great stories to tell about that, stories I hope will touch people's emotions.

Mark

1/19/2023 04:16:32 pm

You are so right. We like to think we are rational creatures, but our emotions overwhelm at times and short circuits our capacity to think. Consider the Fight or Flight syndrome, it has saved our lives for many years without the need to stop and analyze the threat.

That essay sounds interesting because most people don't want to be unseen unless they have been severely wounded or mistreated for a long time. Considering it as a gift is a nice way of looking at the issue. I have no doubt your essay will touch many in a positive way and it will irritate others as well, who might lash out at you from guilt.

Autism and ADHD have been given a negative reputation for years. I imagine that is because when people are afflicted with those issues as kids, they are unable to control their impulses and behavior thus embarrassing the adults caring for them. There is a positive side of great creativity and artistic vision for many.

New questions.

Are you an under-writer or an over-writer?

When the first draft is done, do you need to add more to it to flesh it out or do you have to cut material because there is too much?

Vicki Lein link

1/19/2023 05:37:30 pm

I used to think over writing was good writing. I used to think I needed to go over every sentence, meticulously, searching for passive voice, and blah blah blah. The subtext of this kind of writing is: aren't I smart? Aren't I a great writer? I don't need you as a reader because my writing is complete without you. I had an interesting experience in graduate school that taught me this lesson publicly. What I learned, was to trust my free writing, to trust the space in writing that gives it life and oxygen. When I write, I just write and write and write and write and write. Then I let it sit for a while and come back to it and see if it needs more filling out. Sometimes I repeat concepts, and I'm never sure if the repetition helps or is boring. I think it is a fine line and I'm sure sometimes I write too little and sometimes I write too much. Bless my heart!

Mark

1/19/2023 05:47:25 pm

Bless your heart, indeed. You make a good case for as little editing as possible, but many will seek to polish and embellish as much as they see fit.

However, many writing fiction seek to streamline their prose and keep their writing as succinct as possible. This seems to be driven by readers and the market. Authors are being told from all sides that most stories need to be short so the readers can finish quickly and buy the next volume. Many writers are doing that. If a reader likes the first book, most want to buy the next book. So, writers are under some pressure to pump out multi-volume sets.

New questions.

What is your writing routine when you sit down to write?

Do you write in a straight line or do you write whatever the muse provides for you at a given moment?

Vicki Lein link

1/19/2023 06:42:20 pm

Julia Cameron, in her book, "The Artist's Way" recommends writing morning pages every day. You sit down and write three pages long hand and you just write, write, write and you don't worry about anything. You let it flow and see what happens. Often when I write morning pages, some line will stand out. Once I have a first line for an essay or a poem, then I write write write and it's fun fun fun. With this essay, that's cooking in me, the one about the gift of being invisible and misunderstood, I'm letting it cook. It has not yet asked me to write it. I will know when that moment comes, and I will have fun writing out the first draft. Then I will go back over it and see where there's too much and where there's not enough. Then I will give it to my husband to proofread and get comments from him. Then I will look it over again and probably publish it on Facebook.

Mark

1/19/2023 06:52:01 pm

A lot of authors recommend daily writing. Some swear by it and some swear at it. I am not a writer, but daily writing makes sense to me. I admit to being a creature of habit, I like a regular routine. Maybe I am getting old. I know I am the same age as a lot of old people.

New questions.

Did your writing process change much from your early books to your current book or did it stay the same?

Now that your book is published, is there anything about it you would like to change?

Vicki Lein link

1/20/2023 10:11:33 am

A book published in Lulu can be updated at any time for free. That is a whole lot better that when I published with Xlibris, which cost me a lot and took a long time to make corrections.
I'm a better writer now than I was 15 years ago, and that's as it should be. I am better at hearing when I'm redundant, hearing when it's creaky and not easy to understand. I just enjoy writing most of the time. Making editing changes is very challenging for me because of my low vision. And I really miss being able to read my writing out loud.

Mark

1/20/2023 10:20:59 am

The more I hear about Xllibris the more I realize I would not use them nor recommend them to anyone.

Homophones, words that sound the same but have different spellings, befuddle almost all authors. It certainly makes sense that your dictation software struggles with them also. With your near blindness you cannot hear the difference. I have been correcting your answers as you asked me to. The software almost aways uses the word "right" when you mean "write". It has also misspelled "Xlibris" as "ex libris".

You are improving in your craft and that is a good thing.

New questions.

What do you do to launch a new book when it is first published?

Have you ever participated in a book blog tour, why or why not?

Vicki Lein link

1/20/2023 11:52:50 am

I paid over one thousand dollars to launch "Woman With a Voice" and got zero results. For my revised Radical Kindness Warrior book, I have paid for three months of social media marketing, costing about seven hundred.
Blog book tour? Sounds wonderful! I've never heard of this.
What I have learned is that speakers and authors are a niche market. I've hired business coaches, spending a lot of time and money. I get gigs when people see my work and champion me. I keep trying because I know my work is good for the world. I keep moving with an open heart, ready for that one person who gets me and gets the value of my ideas to help me find an audience.
I love the book promotion blog idea, though. Sounds like it is worth investing in.

Mark

1/20/2023 12:04:23 pm

Promotion and marketing are expensive. With so many books crowding the market, it's impossible to gain the attention of readers without promotion and marketing. A million new books are published every year. Some authors will rerelease an old book every year or two with a new cover and maybe a slight rewrite.

One of my favorite blogs is about pursuing the local author angle. How to be a marketing star right where you live. Another copy-and-paste link or search the title in the box below: https://annerallen.com/2019/08/hometown-book-marketing/ I would add a few tips, seek out literature teachers at the high school and college level to share in their class and there might be a club in the school. Local newspapers are a good resource for an interview as well as local cable access. There might also be a broadcast arts curriculum and/or a club at the high school and college level. Have some question ready to hand the interviewer if they seem uncertain.

If there are tourist destinations try and place your books with the local author angle. Museums, gift stores, motels, hotels, tourist attractions are all possibilities. Keep a box of books in your trunk. Get a counter-top holder for a few books, paste a picture of the cover on the holder behind the books and put re-ordering information on the back of the holder.

Consider renting a table at a comic convention, county fair, farmer's market or a flea market. Have free swag to hand out such as a bookmark and sell mugs or posters. There are so many ways to be the 'local author' I doubt I have exhausted the list of possibilities.

Book blog tours are another online option. Sometimes a brief interview is included usually conducted by email. Here is another copy-and-paste link or hit the search box below: Do This, Not That – Blog Tours
https://www.thebookdesigner.com/2020/06/do-this-not-that-blog-tours

New questions.

What kind of marketing has worked the best and the least for you for this book?

Speaking of marketing, why did you pick me to help promote your book?

Vicki Hannah Lein link

1/20/2023 01:08:40 pm

Cleone has worked with you for years and recommended you. I trust her so I trust you.
When I used to present at international school conferences, I would sell up to two thousand dollars worth of books and CD's. Who buys CD's anymore? I've done some "Book singings," as I call them where I have someone read from my book and I lead the group in some of my original songs. That was super fun and I would do that again in a heartbeat. I'm hoping some nonprofit will discover me and set up a national tour. If I keep putting myself out there, the right one person might find me. This is what happened for the book Everything I Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten. do you know the story of this book?

Mark

1/20/2023 01:43:00 pm

Cleone is a mighty fine person and I consider it an honor to have worked with her for many years.

CD? Isn't that an investment term? ;-) Of course, I jest. Compact Discs of music swept cassette tapes off the market which swept 8-track music tapes off the market which led to the demise of records. Now, records, more popularly known as vinyl are gaining market share slowly.

I love the idea of book singings! A great concept to involve people with your art and wisdom. The right sponsor will enable your message to spread much faster!

New questions.

What software do you use to write and publish your books, and why do you use those?

Have you recorded your music at home or elsewhere?

Vicki Lein link

1/20/2023 05:10:43 pm

I am a Mac person. I use Pages, which used to work very well for me, but the "improvements" have made it much harder for me. Ha, ha!
Lulu.com used to work very well for me, but now links are broken and some of my books are missing. Good thing I know how to find the funny faster!
I've recorded in professional and home studios. I remember recording "My Mommy is an Angel" at a studio, and the woman sitting in the booth with me cried as quietly as she could. That song would not let me finish it until the week before my mom died. I sang it to her on the day she died.
Would winning a Grammy compare to that? No. It would be great, it would be fun, it would be interesting and might lead to more opportunities but singing that song to my mother the day she died and having her smile and say, "I like that!" was one of the most amazing experiences in my life.
I keep telling my clients: if you think anything from the external world will fill a hole in you, you are sadly mistaken. I want my books to help fill people up with their authentic glory, so they don't need followers, awards, or a million bucks in the bank.

Mark

1/20/2023 05:18:40 pm

I agree with you most improvements are usually less and solve problems I didn't know existed. I wish they would leave well enough alone.

I am sure it meant a lot to your mom to hear you sing the new song.

You are right, the things of this world will never bring the satisfaction we all yearn for.

New questions.

How do you keep track of all the chapters and events in your books?

Are you a plotter, a pantster, or a hybrid?

Vicki Lein link

1/20/2023 06:44:44 pm

I create a file in my computer, and then each chapter is a separate document. That way I can keep track of what I'm doing and not try to work in a document that's so big it's unwieldy.
I don't understand the terms you asked me about, so I can't answer that question. But I did think of something today while I was listening to harp music. I don't make my living by my writing; I make my life through my writing.

Mark

1/20/2023 06:54:32 pm

That is a good idea. I think many writers do the same.

A plotter is a writer or novelist who likes to outline their book chapter by chapter some go to a greater level of detail and plan or plot their book scene by scene. There are many ways to plot a book or novel out ahead of time. A pantser or panster (writing by the seat of your pants) is a writer who may have only a vague idea of how to get to the end of the book or they only know how it starts and write to find the ending. The latter seems to be more common according to the comments from writers. A hybrid is a blend of the two types of writers.

New questions.

Do you have a defined space for writing at home, or would you be a coffee-shop writer, if we weren’t stuck in the covid mess?

Do you listen to music or have the TV on when writing, or do you need quiet?

Vicki Lein link

1/20/2023 08:32:31 pm

I'm a hybrid! I often plan out chapters and then inside the chapters are right from the seat of my pants. Sometimes as with my essay that I am cooking "The Gift of Being Invisible and Misunderstood", I am planning on stories I will tell. Then I will decide on the logical order of the stories.
I can write pretty much anywhere. I wrote most of "Woman With a Voice" in a coffee shop. I don't need things to be perfect to write. If I needed things to be perfect, I know myself well enough to know that that would be an excuse for not writing anything at all.

Mark

1/21/2023 10:01:44 am

I had a hunch you are a hybrid. As a happy and liberated person, you are free to make choices that suit you best at any moment. Some choices need to be made daily, such as morning writing.

New questions.

What kind of marketing are you doing or planning on doing for your book?

Have you bought any advertising on Amazon, Facebook or other platforms?

What were your results?

Vicki Lein link

1/21/2023 11:20:15 am

I've never gotten any results from any of the marketing I've done. I'm doing this with you this week because this was some thing I hadn't tried and it sounded like fun. It has been fun and I don't know if it's gonna make any difference. I'm feeling a little discouraged today.
Several years ago I spent tens of thousands of dollars with a woman who promised me she could get me results. I ended up calling her and the people she worked with the pseudo spiritual sales machine. They loved bombed me, telling me I had all this good material, and what I needed was help marketing. "Tell me something I don't know!" I replied. You, on the other hand, have done everything you promised to do cheerfully. This experience has been fun and I'm glad I've done it and I've hired you for a week in February and a week in March to help me with two other books. That seems like a reasonable thing to do, a way to get my books and my ideas out there so people can find me

Mark

1/21/2023 12:18:37 pm

Marketing and promoting are the hardest things for authors, it seems. You can never append "the end" to promoting because it has to be an ongoing process. With more than a million new books published each year it is an uphill effort all the time to get your books noticed. As you found out, promises are easy and words are cheap. No one can promise sales, unless they buy copies of your book. There are a lot of scammers out there willing to lighten your wallet.

I only offer exposure, with over 75,000 followers on Twitter, people are going to see your book. Whether they will act on the tweet remains to be seen.

New questions.

Do you have a favorite song or a musical artist?

How do you know when a book is complete, and you should stop working on it?

Vicki Lein link

1/21/2023 01:56:47 pm

The book I'm currently working on, is titled "Loving in Harmony Without Perfect Pitch". That's the working title for now. That gets me thinking about harmony, and why I love harmony so much. I love the Everly Brothers, the Beatles, Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young, Indigo Girls – I love them, because I love harmony. What is harmony? When two or more people are singing a different note, and then the notes blend together in such a way as to create something bigger and better and different than each note separately. To me that's what a good relationship is like.
I've known a few people with perfect pitch, and it is a mixed bag. Yes, if you ask them to sing a flat below middle C, they can do it. But they also hear all the notes that are too sharp or too flat. This can drive them nuts. In relationships. Most of us don't have perfect pitch, so we have to constantly be listening tuning in to who we are and what we want and what our truth is and tuning out our ego and ridiculous expectations.

Mark

1/23/2023 01:03:07 pm

Singing in harmony is amazing. I love listening to group singing, barbershop quartets are very appealing to me. You are so right, the sum is greater than the individual parts.

Last questions.

Did anything in the book come as a surprise while you were writing?

How much research did you have to do for this book?

Mark

1/23/2023 01:04:21 pm

Mark

1/23/2023 01:04:30 pm

Vicki Lein link

1/23/2023 02:48:15 pm

Images will surprise me, one of my favorite things. If I am deeply in the groove, my writing takes me where it wants to go.
My life was the research for the book. When I presented the three steps at a women's retreat, i taught the concepts with three chairs and a hammer. IN the first chair we are telling ourselves a story, hammering into our heads. The story may be true or untrue, but it makes us miserable.
We have to catch ourselves making our lives miserable before we can take the next step. In the second chair, we turn the hammer around and use the prongs to pull out the nail we've been pounding in our heads. Sometimes it as simple as stopping for a minute and taking a breath. Then we smile and change our bring chemistry. We are ready to start thinking.
In the third chair, we use the hammer to build a new story that expands our world.
Every time I teach this process, I teach it more creatively.
Note: I did not hit myself in the head with a hammer, but I came close.

Mark

1/23/2023 03:06:40 pm

I love that story! Great way to illustrate your points.

I have a fondness for hammers. I had many hammers as a sheet metal worker. I have only two now, one of them is my sheet metal hammer.

Thank you, Vicki, you have been a fabulous guest this week on the Word Refiner channel. I have enjoyed our conversation so much.

Until next time, keep on writing.

Vicki Lein link

1/23/2023 03:40:48 pm

Thank you, Mark. You have more than delivered on your promises. You gave me exposure, and the chance for people to find me. Until next time!

From Frustration to Funny in Ten Seconds Flat! by Vicki Hannah Lein, MS Counseling

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