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​book reviews

You Can't Love Your Children Too Much              by Janet M. Nast

6/26/2020

27 Comments

 

A Single Mom's Thoughts On Raising Children
​(A Live, Love, Learn Series)

Multi-volume, multi-genre, non-fiction author, Janet M. Nast introduces us to her book about raising children, “You Can’t Love Your Children Too Much”:
With the humor and insight that can only come from the experience of raising two children on my own, I’m happy to share with you all of my simple, low-cost and unpopular opinions. Parenting is not about money nor is it a popularity contest; it’s about growing amazing, successful adults. Every child and every family is different, so take what works for you and ditch the rest. I won’t be offended, I promise.
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The title says it all--You Can’t Love Your Children Too Much. We raised our three kids and now are reaping the joys of grandkids.
Some might think that this is how kids are spoiled, it’s simply not true if a parent loves their children like the author describes. The children will grow up and become responsible adults.
While much of this advice is available in many different places, this is the only place where it’s shared with such humor and honesty. I love the pictures in the book, I bought the hardback. I was reminded of many of the pictures we took of our kids as they were growing up. Can I show you pictures of my gorgeous grandkids?
The illustrative stories are told with a candor and wit that I love. This is a book for parents and grandparents. After you have raised your own some of the early lessons fade away, so this book provides a nice refresher course and it’s so easy to read.
I give this wonderful book 4.7 stars. 
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You can buy this book:
https://smile.amazon.com/You-Cant-Love-Your-Children-Too-Much
https://www.goodreads.com/-you-can-t-love-your-children-too-much
 
You can follow the author:
https://twitter.com/janetmnast 
https://janetmnast.com 
livelovelearnwithJanet.com 
http://www.instagram.com/janetmnast 
https://www.facebook.com/TheBusinessofLife 
https://www.linkedin.com/in/janetmnastcarter 
https://www.youtube.com/janetmnast 
Tags: Children, raising kids, parenting, single parent, life tips
 
Copyright © 2020 Mark L. Schultz 
27 Comments
Janet M. Nast link
6/27/2020 06:26:28 pm

Hi Mark!
First off, I'm grateful that the errors were as limited as they were. Yes, “ewe” is a sheep, LOL!! I can’t believe I missed that!
Besides all that, I'm also very glad you picked up on the fact that I’m not advocating “spoiling” our kids. To me, that would mean we’d be giving in to tantrums and not applying any discipline or consequences for bad behavior.
Loving our babies means to hug them a lot, show support, and most importantly, teach them what good behavior looks like. With any luck, and enough sleep, we can also set a good example, LOL! I laugh because both my kids have kids of their own right now and I’ve gotten this comment more than once, “But Mom, you made it look so easy.” The trick, I tell them, is to consistently stick to their guns and sighhhh, no, it’s not easy by any means. But if y’all do this, in the long run it does get easier.
BTW – I’d LOVE to see pictures of your grandchildren.

Reply
Mark
6/28/2020 10:11:45 am

Eew and ewe, a simple typographical error, they are so easy to miss, especially when those two letters are beside each other on the keyboard. Homophones and typos are my specialty.
Loving your children, giving them boundaries to feel safe in is not spoiling. The consequences for bad behavior can be pretty cheap when they are young. If they don't learn young, the price for misbehavior rises dramatically.
Sleep is important. I will never argue against that. Consistency in parenting is important also. Rules are necessary to protect children, but some rules are more important than others. Choose wisely the rules that are not negotiable and the rules that can be negotiated, as the kids get older.
First question.
Please, tell us more about yourself. Perhaps something a little bit beyond your bio.

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
6/28/2020 01:28:02 pm

This is always a tough topic to address…not because I can’t think of anything to say – as you can see, LOL – it’s thinking of the the right thing to say. My bio already talks about my living all over the countryside and why, and the book is all about my kids, so I think I’ll start with the whole computer thing.
My computer career actually started with punch cards back in the fall of 1975 – I absolutely hated it and dropped out of THAT plan till 1981 when I got hired at Mitchell Manuals. For those of you who don't know that name, think automotive repair manuals (Mitchell, Chilton, Motors). Mitchell gave me my first teaching opportunity in 1983 - and as a traveling trainer, (aka, road warrior) it was a BLAST!!!!
Oh, and the main reason I was hired at Mitchell: I had some experience with cars. I loved working on them (and driving them) so I was allowed to hang out in the auto shop class in high school and then I took an engine building class at the GM plant in Flint Michigan. My sister and I were the first girls allowed to take these classes. It was a very progressive thing to do back in 1973-74. That and the drafting class I got into in 1971.
(If you have a burning desire to review my most current resume, it lives on my Linkedin account, which you can access by clicking on the Linkedin link above.)
Ironically, I have a degree in Fashion Design. After realizing that I hated computers, I went to college to become a “rich and famous fashion designer.” That I loved! Still mechanical, still logical, but a lot more creative. But oh geeze, that’s a tough field in which to make a living! After a few years of designing wedding and prom dresses, I realized that it wasn’t a steady enough of an income to pay the rent on a regular basis. Thus, the switch to relying on my automotive interests and getting hired by my father-in-law at the time, at Mitchell.
I still love to sew, and I still think there’s time for that. There are just so many other things to do though, like work on my next book, complete my new website, read some good books, and tend to our fruit and vegetable garden. Then there’re all the places we wish to visit in our “new” used camper trailer, the berries to pick in Washington in a few weeks, and all the canning to do of said berries.
Ya know, it seems like there’s a TON more to do now than when I was working full time. Who ever said retirement is the time to sit back and relax? Hahaha!

Mark
6/28/2020 01:41:22 pm

I graduated from high school in 1971. I wanted to take a home economics class, I wanted to learn to cook, sew and take care of domestic issues, I expected to be a bachelor for a number of years. I was not allowed to take the course. Girls only.
It was a good thing my bachelorhood didn't last as long as planned.
I did take drafting in high school and that pointed me towards architecture, though I never completed my college education.
You have such an interesting career path.
New questions.
Are you a full-time or part-time writer?
Are you in the business for love or for money?
Does your work, or past work if you are retired, have any influence on your writing?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
6/28/2020 09:22:33 pm

Oh! Well, I entered my freshman year in 1971 and did all I could to stay out of Home Ec.! YUK!!! Luckily with my mom being a drafting engineer, her word carried a ton of weight to get me into Drafting 101 instead. But I do remember those rules, no boys in Home Ec., no girls in auto shop, wood shop, or drafting. Seems like I came in when the changes were a happening. Sweet!
So, you got swept off your feet right off the get go - yay! Did you pick up a few skills though in spite of not being able to take the classes? Wait, what? Who’s asking the questions? Hahaha!
Well, I’m a part-time writer really. I create a little bit of content for my current book project every day. As you know, in order to sell our books, marketing is a big part of that job. So I’m also a part-time marketing CEO…for myself!
And I’ll tell you, it’s all about the love of teaching kids and parents rather than the love of writing:
I have a strong desire to help parents ensure their kids become the best young adults they can be. This book is all about the behavior aspects of that goal. “Shifting to the Business of Life,” the second book in the series, is the actual survival part of being an adult. Our kids may need to take care of us in our old age so I want to make sure they have the skills to do so. After all, we can’t take care of them after we go skidding into our graves with dust a flying and hair on fire!
So, my love is actually for the teaching. The money is a bonus.
This is an interesting question: Does your work, or past work if you are retired, have any influence on your writing?
It does in a round about way.
After 40 years in the IT world, I do still create computer courseware, do some tech writing and present it on-line, but that’s not really what I would consider my “fun, make a difference” kind of writing per say. The only way my work has had any influence on the fun writing was the fact that since I’m a born introvert, my observational skills are pretty well honed. Here’s what I mean:
As I headed into my 40’s and started interacting with the younger people getting hired, I really noticed their lack of understanding of things like retirement or leasing vs. purchasing a car. For instance, one of our new hires in marketing made a comment that we should “make all the baby boomers ‘take their retirement’ so that the young people like me can refresh our company’s marketing strategies.” Yep, I saw a real need for educating these kids. Statements like that from her, other young professionals like her, and my own kids, have had a HUGE influence on my fun writing.
Between work or personal life though, I’d say my personal life has had more of an influence on my writing.

Reply
Mark
6/28/2020 09:47:29 pm

Yes, I picked up simple sewing and cooking skills while I was single. I could sew a button on, it wasn't pretty but it was functional. My cooking skills were a little more advanced. My best friend really liked my granola.
Working daily on writing, whether fiction or non-fiction is very important. You are right, marketing is a big job. I describe it as an ultra-marathon rather than the sprint most authors wish it was. We will talk more about that later.
Being in retail management for a number of years and even more in construction as a journeyman sheet metal worker, I learned the joy of sharing knowledge also. I discovered I learned something from almost every apprentice I worked with.
Making sure your kids and other young adults had necessary skills is a wonderful thing. I taught our two daughters and son how to do basic maintenance on cars, oil changes, brakes and more. Our girls seemed to appreciate it more than our son.
New questions.
Why did you choose this genre, or do you feel the genre chose you?
Who designed the cover of your book? Feel free to drop a link if appropriate.
What do the elements on the cover represent?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
6/29/2020 11:00:01 pm

I’m glad to hear you got some skills, young man so you won’t ever starve! It’s funny how traditional stereotypical roles are not close to reality for the individual. Neither of my kids relished the car maintenance work, but they both make sure they know their resources to get it done.
Well, I’d say the genre really chose me. Definitely.
The first version of this book was published because of a challenge by my boyfriend, Tom (now my husband). I was always very opinionated about how some/ a lot of parents let their kids run the show in public.
The last straw was when Tom’s newly married, 20-something year old daughter with no children thought she was qualified to give me parenting advice for my two kids in Jr. High. I’d already been on my own with them since they were in diapers; she had just gotten her teaching credential and was starting her first job teaching 3rd grade, yay! I was kind to her but then said to Tom, “she has no idea.”
Anyway, he said, “Fine, you feel so da** strongly about this and you think you’re so smart, why don’t you write a book!?” “FINE,” I said, “I will!” So I did.
Yep, it took me three years to write that book during lunch breaks and mostly on scraps of paper and napkins at Burger King. Then another two years to figure out how to get it published. (We didn’t have Amazon or Kindle then.)
My next book didn’t come till nine years later when my son’s best friend lived with us for a year and a half. His questions along with my kids’ questions prompted that one. Then next year, it was Letters from Bootcamp…another situational book.
Oh, by the way, that first book cover was just as bad as the editing. (It’s still on Amazon via that publisher…I sure wish I could get rid of it there, but I still haven’t figured out how to do that.)
Great learning experience, LOL!!! I now know the value of a good editor and a good cover designer.
When it comes to my covers, while I may have a good idea of what I want, my very good friend, my tech support guy, and my designer, Dick Knuth, does the heavy lifting.
His site is https://www.raknuth.com I don’t think he talks about his editing and design skills there but if someone asks, I’m sure he’d be glad to take on the work.
Regarding this cover I really wanted to show the image of my son, Alan, leaving home and how much I loved him.
With that I felt it would illustrate that one can be a tough parent, as described throughout my book, and at the same time be a loving parent as shown in the picture. Yes, both options are possible and highly rewarding. It’s like you know you’ve done a good job with your kids when they can leave home and take care of themselves, and bonus, you have a great relationship.
Just so you know, this picture is of the two of us the day he separated from the Marine Corps and had to move to Nebraska for his first civilian job. It broke my heart…I had about 30 minutes with him after driving 3 hours to say this goodbye. Yep, that’s me falling apart. (Crap, I still tear up just thinking of that day in 2013.)
I wished that I could have found a similar one of my daughter, Jenn, and me but it seems like most of our pictures together are of her and me laughing like hyenas. Which is also good, but not the message I wanted to portray. I did want to honor her too though, so I found a good one of the two of them together for the back cover. Those two are tight too.
Sighhhh…I could talk about them all day and all night, which is why I keep writing books about them or for them. Ok, I’ll say, “Goodnight Chet,” now.

Reply
Mark
6/29/2020 11:17:57 pm

I did not starve during my bachelor years, few though they may be. I am not a great cook, barely passable but adequate.
I love how you got the impetus to write this book. A little hubris in another person can go a long way.
I like the connection between discipline and loving relationships the covers provide. Excellent idea.
Having your children grow up into responsible adults is wonderful. Our three kids have done well, between the son and youngest daughter we now have five grandkids. Our first grandson arrived the day after Christmas.
New questions.
Was it hard to come up with the title? What was the process?
What other books and genres have you written?
Have you entered any writing contests?
Have you won awards of any kind for your writing?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
6/30/2020 08:48:34 pm

Actually, none of my book titles were difficult to dream up. Since all of them are basically autobiographical or based on my personal experiences, their titles were all pretty easy.

“You (just) can’t love your children too much, there’s no such thing,” was something I said to my boyfriend/ husband when he challenged me to write the book. I think with a little editing, it worked out well.

“Shifting to the Business of Life” started out as “The Business Of Life” because that’s the only way I could describe the information I wanted to share with teens. I floated the title by a coworker and he suggested I add the “shifting to,” referring to what kids need to do when they graduate high school rather than staying in that “living at home and letting mom take care of me” mindset. (If anyone would like a free kindle version, look for the “Free Kindle Book” link in the right-hand navigation bar on my website: www.janetmnast.com)

And of course, “Letters from Boot Camp,” fits. I was really surprised no one else had used that title or even really published such letters. I mean, when these kids are in boot camp, at least for the Marine Corps, they have no other means of communication with the outside world: no phones, no computers. So it’s seems to me they would all be writing.

Well, my son wrote me three to four letters a week, not to mention what he wrote to his sister and girlfriend. (I sent him one every single day.) His letters were very beautifully written – which surprised the heck out of me since I couldn’t ever get him to do homework in high school – and full of daily happenings with his drill sergeants and fellow recruits. He also shared his thoughts and feelings about his experiences there as well as some old situations that had happened before he left home. Many brought me to tears; some because it’s like I’m glad he “got it” and others because I was so damn proud of the person he had grown up to be.

The only other book I’ve written that’s not about my kids, is a little book (32 pages) I put together for the company from which we bought our first manufactured home: Future Homes of Bremerton. The process of doing this was a nightmare because there was no written process I could follow. And it seemed like I could never put all the steps in a logical order in my mind…so I wrote it all down. Now the owner of the company buys the book from me for their clients. That was kind of a little “bonus” book.

As far as writing contests or award, in the most literal sense, no, I’ve not done either. Neither options have ever really occurred to me. Or maybe I’ve just approached it a bit differently.

Here’s what I mean: I’ve reaped a boat load of personal rewards by submitting for articles to be published (thereby competing with other authors) and also getting selected for interviews with various media outlets, i.e., NBC in San Diego, Las Vegas Review Journal, Pahrump Valley Times, and KIVM in Pahrump.

Up until last year, I would submit a lot of articles for an online site called: Help a Reporter Out (HARO). Have you heard of that? Well, whenever they chose one of my articles to be published, I was tickled to death. To me that was like a prize, and, lucky for me, a lot of my articles were published.

My favorite and most exciting one was this one piece I did on how to organize a productive meeting that got published in a book called: “The Young Adult’s Guide to Robert’s Rules of Order.”

There’s a (long) link to my article on the Media page of my site, but anyone can buy the book on Amazon.

The most exciting “award” (for me) happened most recently when the local high school agreed to have me come in to teach material from my “Shifting to the Business of Life” book. That opportunity came together right before the country shut down. I’m hoping to pick up again with that this fall. We’ll see! Keep your fingers crossed!

Just curious, do you think it would be a good idea to include links to all these articles an interviews on my site? There are a few, but not all, right now.

Reply
Mark
6/30/2020 09:08:05 pm

Yes, adding those links would be helpful to your visitors.
I like how you think about getting published as an award. I agree with you, it certainly is.
You fulfilled the writer's dictum to 'write what you know' quite well.
I love the idea of your 'Business of Life' being used in a lecture for high school students. When a young person, of any age, enters the real world from an artificial or controlled environment it is a shock. I recall struggling with a check book and credit cards as a young person.
New questions.
You have quite a few non-fiction books to your credit. Are you going to write more?
Have you thought about writing fiction short stories or a novel?
What genre do you think you would start with?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/1/2020 09:17:53 pm

I think we ALL struggled with checkbooks back then, LOL!!! And credit – OMG – so many kids learn the good and bad of that the hard way, don’t they?

Well, I’m really looking forward to working as many kids as possible in the high school. I’m also hoping to get a lot of the material posted in a lesson form on my LiveLoveLearnwithJanet.com site by the end of this year. I really want to help as many people as possible with this type of information.

Yes, I will be writing at least one more non-fiction book in the very near future. As a matter of fact, I’m working on it right now.
My son gave me this bright idea back in January so I’ve been plugging away on it a little bit every day.

He said, “Mom, you have to keep your social media posts short enough for me to read in about 10 seconds. With Mazi (his 18-month-old daughter) running around all the time, I don’t have any free time to really read much of anything anymore, but I need all the help I can get.”

With that, the book was born! The cool part is that I’ve gotten some great material from him as well as my daughter.

The working title is, “365 Easy Peasy Parenting Tips,” with the idea that the secondary title will be something like, “for parents who don’t have time for sh**.” Yeah, I’ll be giving that some more thought, ha!
Although I write something every day, I’m also running a contest for other parents to submit their ideas as well: it’s my pinned tweet on my twitter account. I’ve gotten a ton of good ideas so I think this is going to turn out really well.

The plan is to have the Kindle version published sometime in the first quarter next year. We’ll see.

Funny you should ask about writing fiction or short stories. I’ve actually thought a lot about that…so much so that I’ve written a couple short stories already. (The second one has gotten a lot of good feedback from the few friends with whom I’ve actually shared it.) But they’re still based on fact, although I did change some names to protect the innocent, haha! I’m just not sure how to share them with the general population. I mean, do people actually sell short stories? Right now I seem to really be in a “teaching” state of mind, but I could eventually change gears. Hm, I’m open to suggestions.

As far as the genre, well, I’d probably stick with romantic drama. Sadly, with a few divorces under my belt, I have way too much experience with that. But, hey, at least I know the topic, right?! The other reason though, is because I do like to read that sort of thing to relax. You know, when you get caught up in someone else’s drama it’s easy to let your mind wander, then relax and possibly forget your own for a while.

Good questions, Mark, you’re really making me think! I love it! Can’t wait to see what comes next.

Reply
Mark
7/1/2020 09:39:04 pm

I was determined to balance my checkbook every month, as a young adult, I did pretty well. Marriage introduced a fair amount of chaos into my setup, balancing the checkbook got a lot harder. That was a long time ago. Now, I just look it up on the app.
I like the idea of the 365 tips. You could license a desk-style calendar to go along with the book.
There are magazines, websites and contests that pay for good short stories. It can become an income stream. Check out any of Anne R. Allen's blogs, I have several on my Highly Regarded Blogs page, at the bottom of her blogs she lists honest contests. Many blogs have been written about short story sales also. Also check out Writer Beware blog, I have some of those also on the page.
Romantic Drama might be an easy one for you.
New questions.
I noticed that your book is in Kindle Unlimited. How is that working out for you? How many books have you put in KU?
Have you ever gone through the query process, seeking an agent or submitting directly to publishers or did you go straight to indie publishing or self-publishing, and why?
What are the main advantages of being self-published as opposed to getting a book deal?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/3/2020 03:27:43 pm

Oh good information regarding short stories. It looks like you just opened up a whole new world for me, thank you very much!

Funny thing about Kindle unlimited. That was one of those things the publishing app prompted me for when I uploaded my files for publication. How is it working out for me? Well, I really have no idea. I couldn’t tell you what it’s done or not done and I’m not sure how to find out. Sadly, I’ve completely forgotten to look that up, maybe I will in the near future now that you’ve asked. The thing I can tell you is that every time I “Kindle’ize” a book, I check the “yes” box for that. So as far as I know, I have three books in Kindle Unlimited.

I’ve only gone through the query process once, and that was for my first version of this book back in 2005. After sending out maybe two dozen or so, I got zero (0) replies. Not even rejections, just no reply. At the same time I was spending some time trying to figure out the pros and cons of self publishing vs. traditional publishing.

Anyway, after all the work that went into each query package, I decided I didn’t want to screw around with it anymore: I just wanted to get my book “out there” and move on to the next steps of marketing and basically, finish this project. After all, I was still working full time and my kids were in high school…I was out of spare time.

However, back then the whole “vanity publishing” thing was in it’s infancy and there weren’t a whole lot of options. I don’t even think Amazon / Kindle had been invented at that time. So, it was real easy for those self-publishing companies to appeal to your “vanity” and convince you to spend a ton of money with them. I was trying to do my research and be cautious but stay optimistic with this option. So, after attending a few “writer’s and publisher’s” seminars, I went with Author House. And yep, it cost me a lot. Luckily I went through the Library of Congress for my ISBN number…so at least I didn’t lose the rights to my own book. But I still can’t get that company to take it off of Amazon. That’s been a 4-year battle now, sigh…

Anyway, back to self publishing. By the time I got around to writing another book in 2015, Amazon Kindle was well established and many of my cohorts in the writing group were raving about them. I decided to just go for it...with no absolutely no idea why I shouldn’t.

I mean, I still can’t think of any advantages to chasing after, and then working with, a traditional publisher. At this point, I pay my editor, my book cover designer, do all my own formatting (my 40+ years teaching computer software gave me those skills) and then just get it all uploaded and get ‘er done. I don’t answer to anyone’s opinions, deadlines or contractual obligations. And then I do all my own marketing…which is no picnic by the way. But from what I’ve learned over the years is that if I actually got a contract with a publisher, I’d still be responsible for most all of this anyway, except maybe not having to pay for an editor or a cover designer.

Who knows, I could chase that rabbit again. But I’m pretty happy to have a book in a timely manner that I can use and refer to when I’m ready to, when I have the passion and momentum going. Not 1-5 years down line after putting a ton of time and energy into getting a publisher.

That said, if anyone who reads this has more information and can educate me on the subject, I’d really like to hear about it: I’m always open to learning and improving my process.

Reply
Mark
7/3/2020 05:25:34 pm

You will want to check into Kindle Unlimited. There might be money waiting for you. Being in KU ties you to Amazon for a length of time. You can't put your book on any other platforms until the contract runs out. Many authors avoid KU for that reason. They want their book to be as widely distributed as possible.
Some authors send out more than one hundred queries with little or nothing to show for it. I am convinced that it is a lost cause for most authors. Most of the major publishers have gone out of business or been swallowed up by another. Their profit margins are so slim now, they are very risk averse. All thanks to Amazon, the real major player in the market now.
You are right, the author is still responsible for marketing and promotion of their book, regardless of who is publishing. By doing it yourself you get the profits. Marketing is the hardest nut for most authors to crack. I remind authors that marketing is an ultra-marathon, not the sprint they are hoping for.
Many blogs have been written about promotion and marketing. I have several on my Guest Blog page and my Highly Regarded Blogs page. There are so many ways to promote a book, I tell authors to devote an hour or two every week or two for marketing, after developing a plan.
New questions.
What are the three most important considerations for an independent author to be certain of when signing a contract with an independent or hybrid publisher?
How was the experience publishing your book with Amazon?
Is using Twitter and other social media part of your marketing strategy?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/3/2020 07:07:14 pm

Oh wow, good to know about KU. I will definitely read up on them. Just goes to show how clueless I’ve been. Yikes! And I’m glad we’ve come to basically the same conclusion regarding traditional publishing vs. self-publishing…I’ve always felt I’ve been on the correct path for me.

Well, publishing with Amazon always seemed fairly easy to me. Ok, after I figured out how to set up the page size, the correct margins and bleed, and then the cover size. Now, after I type all the text into a Word doc, I just make sure I set all the correct measurements up in my desktop publisher app first (I use the open-source app, Scribus) and then copy and paste all my work right into the correct format. When that’s done correctly, uploading the final manuscript and cover art into Amazon is a piece o’cake.

That said, I whole heartedly agree that writing and even publishing the book are the easy parts; marketing is where the real work begins. (Of course, I had no idea after I wrote and published my first book, LOL!) So I participated in a ton of on-line general marketing and social media marketing webinars right after I published my second book in March of 2015.

Weirdly, I was really able to walk the talk after all those classes and got hired on as a Creative / Marketing Director for a company in the fall of 2016. Then somewhere in there I even picked up a short contract to do a social media study for another company and write out a full report regarding how they should set up their their social media marketing plan. Those two jobs were probably the most ironic things that have ever happened in my life because I was so clueless on the subject up until then! Such a kick!

Even better though was that I got pretty darn good at putting together marketing plans and implementing them. Now that I’ve done a few it’s gotten easier; I do a new one every year. I may not stick to them – this year went belly up around mid-March because of the shut down – but at least I have a guide that gives me direction. Just throwing things out there and hoping they’ll stick is NOT a good plan.

Yes, besides Twitter, I use Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Email campaigns (thank you Mailchimp). However, again, when everything shut down, my in-home tech support business went out of business so I’ve been scrambling to put all my computer knowledge online (Speaking of a lot of work!) and really fell behind on my marketing plan.

On the positive side, I have a great new website and, lucky for me I know how to do all this work so it’s only cost me my time. Either way, I finally got a good first version of this new site up and running a few days ago.

Shameless plug: https://livelovelearnwithJanet.com

There are five free lessons – including MS Word – to get your feet wet, but any of my fellow authors who are new to Mailchimp may want to check out those lessons and the library!

The way I look at it, at least I’ve kept busy and I’ve opened up a whole new revenue stream. Now I really do need to get back to that marketing thing for my books and my new site! Oh boy, we adjust and keep on swimming!

Reply
Mark
7/3/2020 07:51:19 pm

Once you have the details locked in the rest is pretty easy.
Nice to know there is an open-source app that works well.
That social media job and contract sound like great on-the-job training. You took all the knowledge in and were able to spit it back out to help others! Wonderful.
I am going to add your new website link to the review.
Are those five lessons on your website?
You have made good use of your time. A new revenue stream is excellent.
New questions.
How do you think your book compares to a book published by a major publisher?
There are many unethical practices in publishing, which one is the most unbearable in your mind?
Have you thought about doing an audio book?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/4/2020 12:36:36 pm

Ha! I surprised myself with those marketing jobs! For years when I worked at The Ken Blanchard Companies I always saw marketing as this huge mystery and was intimidated as heck by it. We had some very talented and creative people in that department. I’m just thrilled that I had the opportunity to learn it and apply it as quickly as I did...it took about a year of intense learning. Of course, I also learned that there’s nothing wrong with hiring people who can fill in the gaps of that for which I had no talent, such as creating professional looking graphics!


Why thank you for adding that link - I really appreciate it.

All the lessons- including the five FREE ones – are only on the learning website. I included a link to that site on my www.janetmnast.com site under the “Resources” menu but I know I need to put it in plain sight somewhere else, I’m just not sure exactly where yet. This is the part where I’ll be talking with my graphic designer/ tech guy for help!


Personally, I’d say my book is comparable to all the other paperback books I’ve bought over the last 40 years. I think Amazon does a really good job in regard to the quality of the materials they use and their printing. Of course, the interior formatting is also up to par but that’s because it was done by me after looking at hundreds of books to learn what to do or not to do.


Interesting point for other authors to take note of here: Amazon doesn’t do any page formatting and they don’t offer up any suggestions either. One can search their knowledge base, but if you don’t know what you don’t know, that may not be a great resource. As I said, looking at other books for your formatting options is a really good way to go.


You know, other than the feeling that I really got taken for a ride with my vanity publisher, I’ve not encountered any other unsavory issues in the publishing world. Hm, maybe I’m still naive and very fortunate. Do you have a blog resource for things to watch out for? I’d be very happy to share that. Besides, I really don’t know what I don’t know.


Yes I have thought about doing an audio book... I even looked into it and started recording one once when my son-in-law asked me to record my “Shifting to The Businesses of Life” book. But it got to be pretty challenging because if I made a mistake, I had to start over again. I got very frustrated , very fast. The videos I record for my computer training lessons are only ten minutes long at most and it can take me all day to do just one because of the same issue. If I can learn how to edit the recordings, maybe I’ll go in that direction again one day. I’ll never say never to that!

Reply
Mark
7/4/2020 01:43:03 pm

Taking a lot of money from an author is bad enough; but if they took all of the intellectual property rights (there are many) that would be much worse, because that represents all of the future earnings.
Business Musings by Kristine Rusch has a long-running series about licensing which is very informative, links on my HRB page. Writer Beware focuses on publishing scams, links again on HRB. Joanna Penn covers a lot of different topics, links on HRB. Including audio books and DIY.
New questions.
Do you have a favorite book by another author or just favorite authors?
Did you have a favorite book as a child?
Which of your books is your favorite, and why?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/4/2020 10:40:50 pm

Thank you for those resources; I’ll check them out too. Boy am I leaning a lot here; thank you!

I actually started reading books for fun in junior high school when I picked up one of my mom’s Agatha Christie books. It was love at first read! Mom and her friends used to trade them among themselves and we ended up with about 30 of them: it was heaven on earth! Yup, Agatha Christie was my favorite after I got through reading my TEEN and Tiger Beat Magazines, LOL!!!

More recently, well, shortly after high school anyway, I came across a book called, “Bid Time Return.” I very rarely read the same book twice but I think I’ve been thru this one a few times over the years. Hmmm now that I’m thinking of it, I might have to pick it up again. Oh, I should mention that it was made into a movie called, “Somewhere in Time.” And they did such a great job of it; loved it!

Funny thing is I can’t remember the name of the guy who wrote that story so I can’t say he’s my favorite author. Usually I read murder mysteries so these days I’m pretty happy to pick up Tammy Hoag, Sandra Brown, Lee Child, James Patterson, Harlan Colin, John Sanford, Michael Connelly or even a good John Grisham for a good legal thriller. Nope, no one favorite; lots of favorites.

When it comes to my own books, I can’t pick a favorite. Probably because they were all written at a time when I was passionate about something. Each one still evokes an emotion in me when I think about something in them.

For instance with “Love Your Children,” I’m always reminded of how glad I am that I was able to break the pattern of emotional abuse in my family and raise my kids in a loving, but no less strict, household. And I’m so darn proud of those two!

“Letters” just makes me tear up every time I read one of the letters. We were all so worried about Alan surviving USMC boot camp because he’s such a kind hearted kid. But in those letters I learned that he also is very strong emotionally which is the key to surviving boot camp. Again, I burst with pride.

“The business of life” always makes me think of how anxious and excited I am to teach teenagers regarding how to be adults after high school. Sadly, there are a lot of parents who don’t know the material in this book so I’m always thinking of ways to reach them as well.

Ok, that one’s a different set of emotions.

But all of these emotions I feel about the information in my books are what keep me motivated to teach, to share information, all the information I can, to help people to have better lives in some way.

Omygosh, I’m all fired up again! I can’t wait to get back to work again on Monday morning!!!

Reply
Mark
7/4/2020 10:56:31 pm

You are welcome. I have tried to gather resources that writers will find useful on my website.
I was deep into science fiction and fantasy by the time I hit junior high. Somewhere in that time I was introduced to The Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit. I read LOTR three times before graduation from high school. I loved those books.
Since we are both fans of Agatha Christie let me direct you to a book I reviewed not long ago, A Bloody Hot Summer by Trevor D'Silva. Very ably written in the style of AC. I loved it. I would appreciate knowing your opinion of it.
I love how you are connected to your books, I am not surprised that you can't pick a favorite.
New questions.
Does writing have a spiritual or healing component for you, does it energize you or make you feel tired?
Why is it important for writers to tap into the emotions of the characters?
Have you ever done NaNoWriMo?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/6/2020 03:00:52 pm

Oh, I always loving readying a good murder mystery: I’ll check it out. Thanks!

For me, writing isn’t about the writing, it’s about sharing information and teaching. So when I get something done, I feel all excited because all I can think about is that I’m so glad I got that out of my brain, whew! And then, “who can I share it with” and “how am I going to do it?” I feel the same thing when I get a new page up on my website or write a new article to share in my newsletter.

For the one short story I did write, it was important to me to make sure I recorded my girlfriend’s thoughts and feelings when she told me what she went through. First, because I could really feel her pain and dilemma as she share with me. Second, I knew if I did that it would also help readers relate to her situation like I did.

When a reader can relate, they can then feel. And the one thing I learned in “Marketing 101” is that if you can evoke a strong emotion in a person, they become emotionally invested in a character or characters thus almost becoming friends. At that point I believe we do all we can to hold on to that emotion or relationship for as long as we can…which means, buying another book that continues explaining that character’s trials and tribulations.

It may sound cold, but when someone attempts to become a full-time writer, they have to sell something to pay the rent. Evoking an emotional response and using that to draw people in to make an emotional connection is the best way to do it. Believe me, I’ve read a lot of books and this ALWAYS works for me! (The Bicentennial Series (1976) was the first series I ever read and got to experience that first hand – I loved it!)

Although my books are non-fiction, the people about whom I write are very real and I do my best to make them relatable for many of the same reasons.

That said, the most important intention of my writing is to assure people they are not alone in their parenting journey or their journey to become responsible young adults. I strongly believe that knowledge coupled with good positive behaviors will result in more positive life experiences. So if I can get my readers to relate to my experiences with my children emotionally, then hopefully they can adjust their behavior in order to have the same positive parenting and growing experiences in their lives as I have had.

NaNoWriMo? I’ve seen this mentioned in Twitter, but I still isn’t clear to me what it is or why I would participate. It sounds like a competitive writing marathon of some sort. If that’s what it is, I don’t feel the need to participate because for one, I don’t like to compete in much of anything. And second, I only write when I feel I have something to teach. Boy, I’m no fun at all, am I? Hahaha! If I’m wrong though, please set me straight.

Reply
Mark
7/6/2020 03:42:52 pm

I hope you enjoy the story. The next review is for a modern-styled cozy mystery.
You nailed the importance of the emotional connection in any type of writing. Without that critical component the writing and/or characters will seem flat.
It does feel quite good to be able to offer something that will help another person with a problem in their life.
You are right about NaNoWriMo, National November Writing Month. The goal is to write 50,000 words of a first draft during the 30 days of November. Lots of people prepare in advance for it. They write an outline, some do character studies, find pictures of the people or places in their mind, and many join groups for mutual encouragement. The goal of writing a little less than 2,000 words a day is not too hard for a lot of people. There are lots of winners.
Your Live, Learn, Love books are ideal for expansion. You could create a study guide for small groups, a themed journal would be attractive to some, a coffee cup with a line from your book might be good also. Plus, large-print books and audio books should be available on as many platforms as possible. You may need the help of an aggregator for this. These companies help to post books on many different platforms, for a fee of course.
Don't forget sales in foreign markets, in English and translations. Many countries around the world use English as an official language or a second language.
New questions.
What is your writing routine when you sit down to write?
Do you write in a straight line or do you write whatever the muse provides for you at a given moment?
Did your writing process change much from your early writing to your current book or did it stay the same?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/6/2020 06:48:20 pm

Hmmm, interesting. Well, while I never say never, the odds are slim to none that I’ll be participating in NaNoWriMo in this lifetime.

Good suggestions…great minds think alike, doncha know!? I actually have created a study guide for both the “Love Your Children” and “Business of Life books.” Eventually I’ll add both to my learning site, but in the meantime, I’ll be teaching my “Business of Life” program for the first time in the local high school when it opens again: I’m soooo excited about that!!!

Eventually I also want my books available on multiple platforms: It’s just all about the time to learn how and then to just get it done.
Well, when I sit down to write, I do a few things before hand, my “routine” I guess you could call it.

Every day I make sure to shower, do my five whole minutes of exercise, have a good breakfast, then get dressed as if I’m going to my old office job. Yep that includes brushing my hair, accessorizing, and spritzing on my favorite perfume. If I didn’t get ready for work, I’m afraid I wouldn’t be taking my writing seriously and therefore might not get anything done. Besides, if I don’t take it seriously, how can I expect anyone else too?

Then, when starting on a new project, I generally write out a plan of attack because most of my crazy ideas have a lot of moving parts. So if it’s a book, I’d write a broad outline of topics I want to cover; if it’s a new web page; I pencil out a layout and then a flow chart of how that page will connect to other pages; if it’s a newsletter, I make a list of topics and draw out a page layout.

Once the writing begins, I really just pour it all out into the keyboard as it comes spilling out of my brain. There usually is no rhyme or reason on the first draft.

Then I have to go back, read it, and then do my best to clean it up and make sure there’s a logical flow from one topic to another. It sounds like a real mess, doesn’t it? LOL!!! Hey, at lease I start out somewhat organized!

The one thing that changed from my first book to this one is that I now write out an outline of topics to get me started. I could see from my first book that I was all over the place. It’s almost as if that one was the “spill it out version,” and this one is the organized version. Too bad (for me and for those who bought that book) I waited about twelve years to fix it!

Reply
Mark
7/6/2020 07:45:19 pm

I am glad you are on the track of multiple factors and licensing for your books.
I think a routine is important, it saves time in more ways than one. I think planning is helpful in the long run. Plotting out the steps and section of the book for proper flow of thought is important.
Even with plotting, the first draft is going to be a jumbled, hot mess. Its only purpose is to exist, because you can't edit a blank page. Someone said, the first draft is you telling the story to yourself, the editing and rewriting is so everyone else can read it. You write like just about every other writer out there. There has never been a perfect first draft and will never be. I have heard of some people trying to attain that, it leads to writer's block and frustration, for the writer and the muse.
Rewriting and issuing a second edition is a time-honored event. There is nothing wrong with doing that in my eyes.
Last questions.
What software do you use to write and publish your books, and why do you use those?
Are there any authors that influenced the writing of this book?
If you could meet your favorite author, what would you ask them?

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/6/2020 09:03:28 pm

I’m very glad to hear that I’m keeping in line with the best of them in my writing process.

Well, I start all my book projects in MS Word. This not only gives me a place to put all the text, it has some great formatting features that allow me to design the entire page layout as I go.

That said, I don’t end up by using that when it comes to the actually publishing to Amazon. The reason is that when I convert MSWord docs to PDF, it seems like graphic placement and other formatting items really get messed up. I end up by copy and pasting all my text into Scribus, a free, open source desktop publisher. That’s because my final Scribus files always convert beautifully to PDF for uploading. I love it!

Honestly, no other author influenced this book at all. It was all about the challenge from my boyfriend I think I mentioned earlier in this blog. The encouragement I received from my very favorite author along the way, Ken Blanchard, and all my other coworkers helped a bit too.

I have two favorite authors and I’ve actually been very, very fortunate to have already met and worked with Ken for 17years, and Martha Lawrence for the last five or six years I was with The Ken Blanchard Companies. We all talked many times over those years but the best one-on-one time was when I won a lunch with Ken in a fund raising raffle just before I retired in 2015.

Now, you have to know that when you work with, or for, Ken and Margie their lives are pretty much an open book…we all know their kids, their dogs, all about Ken’s travels and speaking events, and we’ve all been invited to various gatherings at their home. So there wasn’t much left to ask about.

But I finally did ask Ken about his first book, “The One Minute Manager.” I was dying to know how he came up with that idea. Funny thing, I don’t think he ever really gave me a clear answer. I just remember that he said it was a good idea that he had and he wrote it all down in about four weeks.

After we got caught up on family happenings at that lunch, he asked me about my latest book project, “Shifting to The Business of Life.” He said he had heard that I had written the first draft in four weeks. When I confirmed, he shared this little gem: “I wrote my first draft of ‘The One Minute Manager’ in four weeks too.” He continued with, “that’s a great sign, Jan, it means you probably have a winner there.” Sweet! I practically did a happy dance all the way back to the office!

As I mentioned earlier, my second favorite author is Martha Lawrence, who is one of Ken’s editors/managers. She used to write amazing murder mysteries. The question I asked her when she started working there was, “why did you stop writing those books?” (Sorry, but her answer was personal so I won’t share that here.)

Yep, these two became my favorite authors because not only do I love their books as an adult, working with the two of them allowed me to know them on a personal level which solidified my respect for them as human beings.

Reply
Mark
7/6/2020 09:16:28 pm

I remember reading Ken's book. I was an assistant manger in a large, regional, retail chain. It impressed me.
That is quite phenomenal, you were able to work with two of your favorite authors. Few writers ever meet their idols. You, Janet, are one in a million.
I have enjoyed our chat ever so much. I hate to bring it to a close, but I have another promotion starting tomorrow. Thanks for sharing everything with us.
Until next time, keep writing.

Reply
Janet M. Nast link
7/6/2020 09:38:23 pm

Yes, I was very blessed to have the opportunities that I did over those years. I’m not sure I would have ever thought seriously about writing a book if I hadn’t met Ken. The fact that I was surrounded by so many other authors while working there just made me realize, hey, if they can do it, so can I. All one really needs is an idea, paper, and pencil.

Thank you, Mark, this was a lot of fun; and thank you for all your kind words. It’s been a long time since I’ve given my writing career that much thought. Hmmm…I’m feeling another writing project coming on!

See you in the funny pages! (Ok, Twitter, LOL!)

Reply



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"I'm very pleased with all your efforts. Twitter promotion and proofreading were beyond what I expected with a book review. Your suggestions throughout the process of refining both books helped me immensely. I look forward to working with you again."   A.E.H Veenman “Dial QR for Murder” and “Prepped for the Kill”